Changes

We’ve made a huge leap....

No.... God has made a huge leap for us.

We were afraid of making this leap without a cushy safety net. We hesitated. We fell back; back into the safe, dark arms of “maybe we can just keep going the way we’re going and never have to take a risk... isn’t it more comfortable here anyway?”

God’s grace has found us, stripped away the safety net that would have strangled us, and set us free.

Ah. Freedom. Terrifying and exhilarating freedom.

My husband has been laid off and we have found ourselves planted firmly on a wide and dusty road. This is new. This is strange. And, like I said, this is freedom.

Three months ago we knew God was leading us away from this job. We knew that it was time to start building our own business. We knew that we were coming up on this new road sooner or later.

We chose later.

And here we are.... fully arrived at “later”.

This is exciting. There is no doubt in my mind that my man can DO this. He is exceptionally gifted and intelligent. He can fix, or build, anything. He works hard. He is honest. He finishes what he starts.

This is also the scariest thing I have ever done. What if he doesn’t make any, or enough, money? What if we can’t pay our rent? What if we can’t buy groceries? What if this doesn’t work?

I feel like Abram, setting out for a new land with only the promise of an invisible God that this will work out; this will usher in new freedom.

I can’t imagine how terrifying it must have been to separate from the familiar and safe surroundings of family and security to enter a land of strangers.

Would they be attacked? Killed? Would they starve? Would they find a space set aside for them?

Would God come through? What would he expect them to encounter along the way?

Oh yes, Abram, I feel you. I wouldn’t say I’m fearing for my life, or the lives of my family, but I have no idea what lies outside of this familiar ground. I have no idea what is down this road.

But I’ve heard that same God call us out. How can I resist?

Brennan Manning said this about Abram:

"What is decisive at this moment for Abram is not a vision of the next twenty years, but a quality of religious experience, a present influence of God. This touches the core of faith; to believe in a personal God who calls me and leads me. Abram obeys that call. for the time being, the call is enough. Had he demanded to know more of the details and practicalities of the game plan, he would have demonstrated the antithesis of faith, for faith is never based on human assurances... The reality of life for christian men and women requires that they leave what is nailed down, obvious, and secure, and walk into the desert without rational explanations to justify their decisions or guarantee their future... Why? Soley and simply because God signals this movement and offers it his promise." (The Signature of Jesus)

So, we’ll go. Do we have any other choice? God speaks. We follow. I don’t even want another way.

I’m sure we seem crazy. We do not have “rational explanations to justify our decisions or guarantee our future”, but we have faith.

And faith moves God. And God moves mountains.

Feet in the dirt. Deep breath in. Looooong exhale.

“God signals the movement and offers it his promise...”

Movement

“Jesus said, ‘You’re tied down to the mundane; I’m in touch with what is beyond your horizons. You live in terms of what you see and touch. I’m living on other terms. I told you that you were missing God in all this. You’re at a dead end. If you won’t believe I am who I say I am, you’re at the dead end of sins. You’re missing God in your lives.”
John 8:23-30 MSG


I’ve been a little panicked.

I have five days of Bible study to write in less than a month.... and I just haven’t done it.

I have one day almost ready to go.

That’s it.

I am too busy, too tired, too unmotivated.

I think about it constantly, trying to convince myself to tear away from my life for an hour to just DO IT!.

Don’t get me wrong - I want to do this. I am soooo looking forward to teaching Jesus at this retreat.

I’m just wrestling with ME.

I’ve been wondering what is standing in my way - why am I not jumping in to the beautiful waves of discovery?

This morning went all wrong. I woke up with raging hormones. I was crying, angry, bloated. Being a female has it’s downside...

Although, looking back, I can see that God stood in my way. He was redirecting me.

So, I pawned my kids off on my dad and rolled out my mat. I made it about two minutes before I was laying on my face, crying. Ah, holy yoga. Things get stirred up; broken to pieces. I found myself anguishing over a dream I had last night.

Sometimes dreams mean something. Not always. But sometimes.

This dream meant something. This dream meant that I was grieving over a lost friendship. This dream meant that it was time to do something. This dream called for movement. This dream was an incredibly holy and painful dream.

This dream meant that I needed to process something I didn’t want to process.

Sigh.

Still processing.

But I did something about it. I stepped out on a shaky limb, totally determined to act in love alone. love. love love.

After that, I opened the file labeled “Jesus the Son”. Day Two, here we go!

I wasn’t writing, or moving forward, because God was stirring something profound inside of me. I was wrestling with my humanity. I was living as if this life were IT. I needed to be reminded that real life is yet to be tasted.

And LOVE is the salt in eternal life. It is the flavor that beckons us.

Who Is He?

I think we have ben carrying around a distorted image of God.

We hold him like a crumbled and faded photograph in our pants pockets.

We pull him out to consider the lines of his face, the depth of his gaze.

We compare photos and nod stoically at the slight differences.

We roll our eyes at the people who carry bright and vivid tattoos of this god on their chests - we despise their boldness.... and we envy it.

We teach classes on the identity and theology of God.

We hold debates over the reality of the man in the photographs.

We tell each other that we must ask, in the right way of course, for this one dimensional god to “show up.”

He must be off somewhere, reading his scriptures and waiting, like an impatient Father, for us to finally use the right phrase to earn his Presence.

Ah, yes. We are the followers of a god who lives outside of His people, yet within the stone walls of a church.

This god makes some people holier than others; some people smarter than others; some people more lovable than others.

But don’t forget to swallow your disgust and shake the hand of a dirty and weary man holding a cardboard sign.

The god of the photos has demanded our sacrifice.

This god lives on the mountains of our lives; forever out of reach; completely intangible.

He cowers in the corners of our souls, waiting for his turn to speak.

The sound of our pride mostly drowns him out.

This god is more concerned with budgets and buildings; programs and teachings, than with the poor and the broken.

But we’ve made this god out of air. He is wispy and explainable.

He fits. He makes sense out of our five year plans.

What about the God of caves and valleys?

Of deserts and wild waves?

Of multiple identities clustered into one Being like grapes on a vine?

Of mystical realities we know nothing of?

Of timelessness?

Of fierce battle and unexplainable depths?

What about the God we cannot understand?

What about the God we have all been longing for, but have been overlooking our whole lives?

Is the god we serve the same God who breathed life into a man made of dust and earth?

Is this the same God who placed countless flaming stars into a perfect and precise pattern in the Universe?

Is this the God who defeated armies and crushed Kingdoms?

Is this the same God who sat with a broken shepherd in a damp cave and wove songs of hope and deliverance into his soul?

Is this the same God who sustains life and creation without every faltering or growing weary?

Is this the same God who separated and abandoned himself to rescue a feeble and failing Creation?

Because the God in the crumbled photograph who fits so neatly in our pants pockets cannot be the same God who holds everything in the palm of his hand.

Either we hold God, or he holds us.

In considering the lives we live, the community we call church and the hope we set our futures on, we must consider the God who sits on the throne of our very lives.

I ask you this question hoping that it will spark a very real and deep investigation - who is the God you live for? Is he a photograph; someone you know little about, but is easily served?

Or is he unexplainable, undeniable, breathtaking, the Rescuer, the mystical God of breath and spirit?

This is part of life on planet earth. This is part of the human existence. We question, we grow, we learn, we change.

So, let’s change.

Heaven

We are on vacation. Beautiful, long awaited vacation.

We have been spending every day watching movies, taking walks, and playing on the beach.

The air is moist and perfect. Not too hot and not too cold. There is a slight breeze almost all of the time and the sound of the ocean echos in the background of every connection filled moment.

This is heaven. Heaven. You heard me. This. Is. Heaven.

I am becoming more and more aware of the reality of heaven. Not the fluffy, harp in hand type of heaven, but the heaven of Hope and Expectation.

I am convinced that heaven is life as it was meant to be lived.

Beaches, fresh and filling food, laughter, connection, joy, barbeques, fireworks, hammocks, and long walks through His creation.

So, this week, I am tasting heaven.

Something Divine and powerful has touched earth and has filled my heart with hope.

We are always saying, “Don’t you wish this could last forever?” Ah. It will.

check out the new blogs and photography!!

http://web.me.com/stephanie.moors/Be_Free_/Be_Free_.html

new blogs and photos!

http://web.me.com/stephanie.moors/Be_Free_/Be_Free_.html

Moving My Blog...

I've moved my blog (and added a few more) to a mac website. you can actually subscribe to the blog and recieve email updates.

enjoy!

http://web.me.com/stephanie.moors/Be_Free_/Be_Free_.html