New Life

I guess I just have babies every three years.

December to March is the most expensive and celebratory time of year for our family - Christmas, birthdays and anniversaries! And THIS year, we are adding another celebration to our busy season - more than that, we're adding to our Village.

Early in December I will, yet again, do one of the most sacred and organic things - I'll give birth to our third baby.

JOY. Such JOY.

My last pregnancy was pretty awful. My marriage was suffering, my life was miserable. I hated every second of it. Thank God for Judah because he made it worth it, but I had sworn to NEVER go through such sorrow and shifting again.

Thankfully, God has other plans and has healed so many of the wounds from that time in our lives. My husband has been a ROCKSTAR - working his ass off to do this RIGHT. He has been supportive, compassionate, and so generous.

My kids are excited and desperate to see their new sibling NOW.

And I am sick. Morning sickness is not my friend. Although, this time around I find myself extremely thankful for every wave of nausea.

I want to really experience and enjoy this pregnancy. I don't think I've ever enjoyed pregnancy. I've enjoyed my children - and I'm addicted to that first little flutter, the sign that baby is jumping around in my womb. But PREGNANCY has made me miserable.

THIS time I want to be IN each moment, rejoicing in this unexpected gift.

One of the things I am anticipating the most is the home birth. This will be my first home birth, but I feel like I've proven to myself that I can do it. I've had two natural births in the hospital and, both times, I felt such a longing to be home with my family, in my own space.

My mom had both of my brothers at home. I was even able to see my youngest brother come into life when I was eight years old. I sat on my parent's bed, next to my little brother, and watched my mama squatting on the floor while she birthed our littlest joy. It was AWESOME.

Even then, I felt such joy and awe at watching life enter the world. Nothing about it was gross or uncomfortable. I have enjoyed every birth I have witnessed since then. And now I get to follow my mama's footsteps and have this baby here at home.

We truly are a village - we live with my parents, my brother, and my brother's friend (not to mention 3 dogs).

This village is in for a fun 9 months! :)