Thursday, February 18, 2010

A New Practice


I've added a new practice to my Holy Yoga practice.

It's the practice of acceptance.

Due to the twisting, folding, lifting, and compressing nature of yoga I am almost ALWAYS looking straight at the things about my body that i despise.

It's actually pretty horrible.

Especially when it's a particularly "sick" day for me.

So, I've started pushing against the flow of my own nature.

Instead of rejecting these offensive body parts and making a plan of how to obliterate them, I'm speaking acceptance to them.

For example: when I look at my stomach I tell myself, "This belly has housed children. It has been a space of nourishment and life. And my kids were built strong and holy inside of this belly. It is sacred - used by God himself to create new life."

And I love my children. How could I NOT love what carried them, what protected them?

Let me be even MORE honest...

It's not really working yet.

It DOES keep my self hatred at bay. But do I feel joy when I look straight at the parts of my body that haunt and shame me? Not yet.

Will I?

I hope so. It is my true and full desire to be at peace within myself.

I offer those distorted self images to Jesus every single day.

I battle them more often than not.

I rejoice in "skinny" days and would be lost without my push up bra.

But this IS my body. This is how God has formed me.

I am healthy. I am strong. I am intentional about how I live.

And my daily offering must always be ME.

So, in Holy Yoga and in life, I am practicing acceptance.

Maybe if I can learn to accept myself as the CREATION, then I can learn to accept the CREATOR. Can I trust that he didn't make a mistake? He didn't slip up when piecing me together.

Although Paul meant something completely different, I am living his words today....

By the grace of God, I am what I am. He grace did not pass by me.

2 comments:

lulliloo said...

You are speaking TRUTH. We don't have to like our bodies lady, to accept that they are part of us...
part of us, but not all of us; we are whole beings, mind, body, spirit, soul. Created in the tangible, feminine image of a breathtaking God. We do not always see the beauty, yet we are called to embrace it~ whether we "like" it or not!

Keep standing in faith, speaking words of kindness and respect over every last inch of yourself. And it will change...

stephanie moors said...

words of LIFE sister! :)